Gratitude for Pigeons

I watch the flight of a flock of pigeons from my window this morning. As I sip my cappuccino and write in my journal, I know they are my spirit guides. What do these scavengers of the city teach me? Their graceful flight reminds me that it's not just the goal of getting "there", but the experience of the process that is most important.

What is the reason for their swooping and soaring? Certainly not merely to move from one feeding destination to another. They fly in unison and I feel the joy in their movement. I experience the connection and trust in their formation and the mutual benefit derived from synergy with the airflows between them. They serve to teach me everything that I need to learn today.

Amen.

Another Synchronicity

Last weekend I facilitated a Constellation workshop in New York City. No matter how many times I do this, I am always moved, touched, and ultimately awed by the divine grace that manifests in these sacred events. This occasion was no exception. A week prior, I had received a phone call from a young man seeking help. He explained that he had suffered a trauma at age 14 that, he felt, had changed the course of his life. This experience came as a result of his parent’s acts and behaviors. Now, more than ten years later, he still suffered damaging repercussions.

He wanted to spare his younger siblings from similar damage and so sought help to “heal his family system”. I told him we could certainly address his issues in the workshop and he was relieved to hear this. He then asked to bring his parents to the workshop. I explained to him that his presence alone would bring his family’s energy to the workshop and that it wasn’t necessarily necessary for both his parents to attend. I also suggested that, not only might he feel inhibited by their presence, but that his parents might also feel uncomfortable sharing their family secrets with the group. I offered that they might be better served by doing a private family session.

All the above notwithstanding, nevertheless, several days later, I received workshop registration for him and his mother and father. On the workshop day, I had some trepidation about his parents’ participation but trusted the process and the fact that “everybody who should be there was meant to be there”. At the beginning of our day together the young man told me that he felt somewhat uncomfortable with his parents there, despite his choice to invite them.

As the day progressed, many others volunteered to present their constellations. He and his family were willing and active participants and visibly moved by their experience as representatives and “holders of the circle”. They did not volunteer to present their own Constellation. Our last Constellation of the day came, and a woman asked to work on behalf of her younger brother. After determining that we had her brother’s permission to do this, I asked her to select representatives for her brother, their father, and five earlier generations of fathers and sons in her paternal family line. Not surprisingly, she chose the young man to represent her brother, and his father to represent their father. At first, in this Constellation, there was great dissention between the generations of men, including the father and son. As the Constellation proceeded, a reconciliation was facilitated between the generations, including the represented son and his father. This reconciliation seemed to be mirrored in the experience between the actual father and son. Later, the son confirmed this to me. He acknowledged that a healing movement had happened between them.

The skeptics suggest that there is no divine guidance. My Constellation experience has repeatedly demonstrated to me that grace and love guides our work in these sacred groups.

2012 Blessings and Prophecies

Dearest friends,

Some of you may be familiar with the myriad prophecies that have been forecast for this tumultuous year. Many cultures and their seers and prognosticators have forecast destruction and mayhem leading up to the 2012 winter solstice. Although many of these supposed prophecies have been debunked by modern science, there still remains the incontrovertible fact that these days are quite challenging.

My practice as an integrative psychotherapist, my work in Systemic and Family Constellations, and my own personal experience, constantly bring reminders of how much we are being tested in the most vulnerable areas of our lives. Some of us are experiencing serious health challenges, others have relationship difficulties, many are suffering financial setbacks and revisions. Both nationally and globally, politics are in upheaval. Seemingly unresolvable polarities abound. The worldwide financial markets are facing restructuring. In fact, restructuring seems to be occurring on the deepest levels of our beings and our society. Our physical and metaphorical tectonic plates are shifting.

It appears to me that the issues that are presenting themselves, both personally and collectively,  are our deepest core issues. We are being called and challenged to review our most deeply held beliefs. The Buddhists tell us that "attachment" is the source of our suffering. Is this the time that we will be forced to relinquish some of these attachments? Attachments to the material things that we crave? Attachments to our fixed ideas of how others should be? Attachments to the belief in the superiority of our ways? What an exciting year we have ahead of us! I pray for our collective consciousness, that we may be receptive and welcoming to the transitions and movements that are necessitated in this coming year. Love and blessings to us all!